I've always had a thing about grouchy old men. Most of them happen to be conservative. It might be because of a few favorite uncles, and friends of my pop. Even in politics, I've been moved by more conservatives than liberals -- you could attribute this to the vastly outnumbered progressives in our state, but I think there's more to it.
They are a challenge to charm and usually make for more interesting conversation. (Oh, there are exceptions. For example, the new chair for the Alaska for Trump campaign.)
I recently met an antique stove savant. He knows more about old cook stoves, the cast iron ones you shove wood in the top, than the factory workers who built them. It's remarkable to visit with him in his shop surrounded by stoves in various pieces, dusty stuffed-trout trophies, walls covered in old advertisements, brochures, and yellowed cartoons bashing Democrats. He sells a lot of stoves to doomsday preppers, and he knows this country is a breath away from total demise.
I like him. When he talks his calloused and sooty hands wave about. I think he's told me a story about every dog he's ever owned, and I'm pretty sure he's been wearing the same Greek fisherman's hat since that country was solvent. We agree on far more things than we disagree on; there's too much money in elections, banks are too big, gold is worth way more than paper, both political parties are a disaster rotting from the head down, Hillary Clinton is worrisome, Donald Trump is dangerous, and fishing is the best way to spend a day.
He lives in a state with primary elections and told me, "I held my nose and voted for Bernie Sanders."
If he'd have told me he was a ballerina I would have been less shocked.
This election is flipping everything we thought we could predict about politics on it's back, leaving it in the bottom of a skiff, gasping for air and waiting for a bonk on the head. Anyone who thinks they know what's going to happen is just guessing. The thing that worries me more than who will become president is, that we as a people are going to end up uglier than the candidates on the ticket.
Case in point: This week, a tow truck driver in North Carolina answered a call to assist a disabled woman stranded by the side of the road after a car accident. When he saw she had a Sanders bumper sticker on her wrecked car, he told her to call the government for help since she was "obviously a socialist." He's a Trump supporter and said, "Something came over me, I think the Lord came to me, and he just said get in the truck and leave. And when I got in my truck, you know, I was so proud, because I felt like I finally drew a line in the sand and stood up for what I believed."
Well, this is awkward, but someone might want to tell Mr. Bigoted Tow Truck Driver that the Lord wasn't speaking to him. The Lord actually said something about helping people broken down by the side of the road in a pretty well known parable called "The Good Samaritan." You may have heard about it. They've named hospitals after it. The most remarkable part of that story from Jesus was the fact that a priest and a Levite -- natural allies, had passed the beaten Jewish man by the side of the road and it was a Samaritan who helped him and paid an innkeeper to give him aid. Samaritans and Jews were mortal enemies. According to my Sunday school teacher, that is the miracle of the story -- you're directed, if you follow the Bible, to care for those who don't agree with you on anything. Way to miss the message, buddy.
A booth at a Trump rally was selling buttons that say, "Life's a Bitch! Don't Vote for One!" and "KFC Hillary Special: 2 Fat Thighs, 2 Small Breasts, Left Wing." Really? Left Wing? Not hardly. I don't like Hillary Clinton's politics, but this kind of sexist attack hurts all women -- and men who actually like women.
With Donald "I love Hispanics" Trump the presumptive nominee, the Republican party is falling all over itself. Oh, our Washington delegation has all fallen in line behind Trump. Think about that for a second. It's hard to feel too sorry for them since they courted the parasite of hate that is now their front-runner. A Clinton-supporting super PAC, Priorities USA Action, "intends to reach out to Republican megadonors disillusioned by their party's presumptive nominee." I have a feeling that non-Trump Republicans may be easier for Clinton to sway than Bernie's folks. They have been waiting a long time to hear a candidate talk about what he is. It's HYUUUUGE. The Democrats are more likely to have a contested convention than the Republicans.
Here's the rub: Alaskans can't afford to not help each other based on our bumper stickers. That's the one thing that has always set us apart. This election is a fierce fight that corporate media absolutely loves. It makes them money. They report on every turn like it's a sporting event -- a blood sport. Maybe it's time to remember the good "Samaritan" during this awful comedy and keep taking care of each other, regardless of our "side."
Shannyn Moore is a radio broadcaster.
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