Dear Annie: As a wife, mother of three and a full-time program manager overseeing a crisis unit, I juggle a lot of responsibilities. Despite my busy schedule, I find myself having to be the one to initiate contact with my husband’s side of the family. If I didn’t, we would likely never see them. Maintaining family connections is important to me, and I’m happy to make the effort, but I feel it’s a shared responsibility.
In today’s fast-paced world, I understand that communication can be difficult. Some people are naturally good at staying in touch, while others think about reaching out but may forget with everything else going on. But when it comes to family, I believe that no one should assume the burden alone; communication is a two-way street, and phones work both ways.
So, to the grandparents with a similar issue: I urge you to pick up the phone and make a plan if you’d like to connect. We can’t always know when you want to visit or talk, and none of us can read minds. Shouldn’t the effort to stay connected be mutual and made together as a family?
-- It’s a Two-Way Street
Dear Two-Way Street: Thank you for your thoughtful letter. Many readers have shared similar suggestions about the importance of grandparents taking the initiative in making plans with their families. I’m sharing your letter here as an encouraging reminder for grandparents to reach out and say that they want to get together.
Dear Annie: I’m writing in response to your column about the woman whose marriage had become strained due to her husband’s drinking. Kudos for emphasizing that he needs Alcoholics Anonymous, but I’d like to encourage you to highlight the importance of Al-Anon for family members a bit more strongly than just one sentence.
Al-Anon has been a lifeline for countless family members of those struggling with alcoholism. It’s not just a place to heal; it’s a community where people can vent, relate, and share their struggles and solutions. The support offered in Al-Anon helps you realize that you’re not to blame for your loved one’s addiction. It teaches that the responsibility for change lies with the person struggling with alcoholism, and it gives family members the tools to navigate this challenging journey with compassion and strength.
I can vouch for this program 100% because it saved my life and even helped heal my marriage. The encouragement and insight I found through Al-Anon helped me set healthy boundaries and rebuild my sense of self during a very difficult time.
Thank you for considering this and for the compassionate advice you offer to your readers.
-- Power of Al-Anon
Dear Power of Al-Anon: Thank you for your letter and highlighting many of the insights that you learned in Al-Anon. I’m so glad that you found healing through this wonderful group.