Dear Annie: I’m feeling torn between pursuing my dream and maintaining my financial stability. I have a job as an accountant making six figures, but it’s boring work -- so boring that I dread getting out of bed every morning. The days go by slowly, and I find myself living for the weekend.
On the other hand, I’ve had a passion for photography since I was a kid. Recently, I’ve started to do some freelance work on the side, just for fun, but the money isn’t great because I don’t have a lot of time to devote to it.
I understand the importance of financial security, but I also fear that settling for a comfortable but unfulfilling job will leave me with regrets. My girlfriend says I would be crazy to quit accounting, and I have the feeling that she would dump me if I wasn’t able to take her out or pay for things.
How do I strike a balance between being practical and pursuing my dreams? Is it possible to have both? I’m afraid of taking the leap and facing potential failure, but I also don’t want to wake up one day and realize that I’ve wasted my life working at a job I hate.
- Torn Between Passion and Stability
Dear Torn: Everything in life is a trade-off, and a balancing act. If you continue as an accountant, you are guaranteed stable pay and predictable hours, but you will be bored much of the time. If you decide to pursue photography, you will work odd hours for unpredictable pay, but you will be creatively fulfilled.
I wonder why you became an accountant in the first place. It must have appealed to you at one time, and you might try to rekindle your lost interest in your career, while continuing to make photography a passionate hobby as part of a well-rounded life. If you do that and you still yearn to devote your life to photography full time, then you will have your answer.
Dear Annie: I recently got a promotion at work, which is great, but I’m really feeling the pressure now. My first project in this new position is with my company’s biggest client, and I’m starting to doubt that I’m really qualified to take on such an important account. I love my job, I work hard, and I think I’m good at it -- but I’m worried that I’m going to fail and that my team is going to realize I wasn’t ready for all these added responsibilities.
How can I overcome all the feelings of self-doubt and gain more confidence in myself? I don’t want to self-sabotage or hold myself back from reaching my full potential. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
-- Seeking Confidence
Dear Seeking: It sounds like you’re struggling with “imposter syndrome,” and you’re definitely not alone. According to Psychology Today, up to 70% of adults feel imposter syndrome at some point in their lives.
Start by reminding yourself that you were promoted for a reason. Management does not hand out promotions without seeing proof of a candidate’s competence. Clearly your work has shown your team that you are well-suited for more responsibility. You should also stay focused on your own achievements instead of comparing yourself to others.
By reflecting on your concrete accomplishments, focusing on yourself and talking through your feelings (through therapy, journaling or conversations with friends), you will be able to manage your imposter syndrome and shine bright in your new role (congratulations, by the way!).